Jokes (page 2):

1. A Man walks into a Starbucks and says, "I am in a Starbucks. I am not a man."


2. Ace of Base walks into a Starbucks and says to the barista, "I'm here to apply for the job." The barista replies, "How do you know about the job?" Ace of base replies, "We saw the sign."


3. A Cow walks into a Starbucks and says, "If only my milk was this homogenized."


4. Christopher Walken walks into a Starbucks and says, "I gotta fever, and the only perscription is more Starbucks..."


5. A Haiku Poet walks into a Starbucks. The barista on duty asks him what he'd like to drink. The poet replies,
   
   Grande Sumatra
   Acrid, blissful; my lifeblood
   Two packs of sugar
   


6. An IKEA walks into a Starbucks and says, "Poäng."


7. An Old Navy walks into a Starbucks and says, "What a lovely symbiotic relationship we have."


8. Any normal person who wants a simple cup of coffee walks into a Starbucks and the barista says, "Would you also like to buy something from our bakery and wash it down with a new Norah Jones CD?"


9. Pat Benetar walks into a Starbucks and says to the Barista, "Hit me with your best shot."


10. A guy walks into a Starbucks and thinks to himself, "Hey! I can spend the majority of an hour's wages on a cup of coffee and still have money leftover for the tip jar!"


11. A typical American in debt walks into a Starbucks after leaving a payday loan agency, and recharges his Starbucks card.


12. A yellow journalist walks into a Starbucks. Millions dead, entire cities decimated, Little hope for survivors.


13. A guy walks into a Starbucks and says,
    • "I'd like a large coffee."
    • The barista says, "Our sizes here (gestures) are Venti, Grande, and tall."
    • The guy (now confused) responds, "OK...ummm...so what is a large?" (the line is starting to build up, and the barista is becoming impatient)
    • "Large is probably Venti," responds the barista."
    • "OK, I'll have a Venti," says the man.
    • "Do you want a slice of Pumpkin bread, a new CD, an extra shot, whipped cream, or a gift card?" asks the barista next.
    • CRAP! The man think to himself, but he actually says, "No, just coffee, thanks."
    • "Do you want your receipt?" asks the barista.
    • Double CRAP! the guy screams in his head. This line is 12 deep! I want a freeking cup of coffee. I have a hangover. I have to drive to Raleigh. CRAP. He says, "No, no thanks. Just the coffee."
    • Immediately upon getting into his car, the poorly-designed paper cup starts to leak at the point where the seam running up the side of the cup meets the lid. (There's a small gap there that causes coffee to spill every time a sip is taken, or whenever the coffee sloshes up the inside of the cup). Frustrated, cheated, and confused, he uses a napkin to wipe up the coffee.
    
    
14. A nun, a priest, and a rabbi walk into a Starbucks. The barista says, "What is this, some kind of a joke?"


15. A trial lawyer walk into a Starbucks. The barista asks him "Would you like to try our house blend?" and the lawyer fires back "On what grounds do you base your coffee?"

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